”LET GO AND LET GOD!”
Every
action breeds a reaction. When things do not go the way we expect, or we find
ourselves in conflict with someone, how do we feel? We feel insulted, unfairly
judged, belittled or demeaned and that the treatment received by us was totally
unjust and undeserved. Maybe our most dearly held views of ourselves have been
challenged. This
feeling is soon replaced or joined by anger, often thinly disguised as
indignation. Anger demands action, or at the very least, some form of
explanation that had better be acceptable to us. So instinctively, we react to
the situation with thoughts of retaliation. If we are rash or impulsive, we rush
headlong into this line of action, often with regrettable outcome. Our inner
light becomes obscured in a vicious cycle of negativity.
When we
feel anger and hatred, our minds become very narrow, our hearts close and our
negative feelings only escalate. The
typical response to an unpleasant feeling is to resist it or to engage in some
activity that may change the nature of the feeling we are experiencing.
Just as
instinctively, we may wish to see the wrongdoer punished, by us or by any
surrogate system. Initially, we want them punished severely. Again, if we are
hasty, we end up overreacting, usually with lamentable consequences in the long
run, though for the time being we may get ample satisfaction. We
hold within us grudges, bitterness and resentment, which later manifest in
stress, ulcers and poor health conditions. Recognising that we cannot control
everyone or everything in our life may create an unpleasant feeling, but it is
essential that we deal with it in order to cultivate equanimity and harmony
within ourselves.
As
spiritual aspirants, it is essential that we learn how to ‘forgive and
forget’ and ‘let go’ of our attachments the in order to be at peace.
However, most of us find this very hard
because we are too attached to our emotions and ego.
Baba therefore emphasises that the only way we
can cultivate this virtue is by cultivating the supreme quality of ‘Forgiveness’
(Kshama).
FORGIVENESS
Next to
love, forgiveness is perhaps the most misunderstood term in the human language.
The meaning of the verb forgive, translates into "to let
go", which is the act of forgiveness. Forgiveness is the process of
releasing the negative feelings given to us by another (perceived or
otherwise).
Kshama
is Sathyam (Truth)
Kshama is Dharmam (Righteousness),
Kshama is Ahimsa (Non-injury),
Kshama is Yajna (Sacrifice),
Kshama is Santhosha (Pleasure),
Kshama is Daya (Compassion),
and Kshama is everything in the world. (Poem)
It
stands out against other options as retaliation, punishment and resentment, the
last option being the resort of the victim who feels helpless in addressing the
wrong in a manner desirable to him or her.
We have
all heard of the maxim, “To err is Human, to forgive Divine.”
However, how many of us are able to follow that? Forgiveness is not an
easy thing for a lot of us. Many of us tend to associate forgiveness with
allowing another to “get away with” whatever it is that he or she has done.
If someone has done us harm, they will be accountable for their actions with or
without our anguish. Forgiveness cannot be learned from textbooks, nor can it be
acquired either from any one else. It can only be cultivated by practicing love
and tolerance. So how can we do that?
Baba
recommends the following:
When we next experience
this negativity, step back from our thoughts for a moment and gain new
perspective. Write down our thought and feelings in a spiritual diary/journal to
gain clarity. Negative feelings evaporate whenever they are analysed calmly,
honestly and dealt with responsibly.
Purify the heart by
being good and kind to all. Do not attempt to find fault with others. Look upon
all with love, with respect, with faith in their sincerity.
Smother the fiery fumes of desire, hatred and anger that rise
up in our hearts. Do not entertain hatred or contempt. Show resentment if we
must, but only through words, not action. “Do not unto another what you do not
like to be done to yourself. For another is really you". Even if
another uses foul language against you, just smile and be calm.
Practice
Silence,
do Namasmarana, Bhajan, Japam, Dhyana, of
single-minded remembrance of the Lord. These will help us when distress assails
us.
Make
every effort to recognise the divinity in everyone. Forget
all the harm done to us by others, and the good that we have done for others. If
someone has done harm to us, we should not be revengeful. Hurting others amounts to hurting our own
self.
Fill every moment with
sacred thoughts, with pure feelings and pure actions. Replace bad thoughts with
good ones. Always remember that we are embodiments of strength and not weakness.
It is easy to do what is pleasant, but difficult to do what is beneficial. A
compassionate heart is the attribute of human nature. It is always giving and
forgiving. Repent for the errors that we commit and decide never to repeat them.
Just as a registered
letter that is not accepted returns to the sender, refuse to ‘accept’ any
insult that some one casts on us.
Have complete faith and
trust in our Lord. Pray for the strength to carry out our resolutions.
Always
remember to ‘Let go, Let God’!